Recently my partner and I decided to move from Canada to the UK. We weren’t happy living in the city we were in and anyway his VISA was up so we had to do something. It was an extremely stressful time, I was working 6 days a week and tutoring on the side, going through the rigmarole of applying for the paperwork to move, rushing home to try and clean our apartment and get rid of everything and preparing for Christmas. More than one day ended with me crying on the floor dramatically. We were so excited to move and were sure that everything would be smooth sailing once we landed in Manchester, where we’d decided to move. Nearly as soon as we got there things started to go wrong. I won’t detail our mishaps but our lives quickly resembled a Buster Keaton film. So my boyfriend decided we should go home to Ireland and ask for help, regroup and make some decisions. Now, I am a very stubborn person and when I get an idea in my head I will suffer through any turmoil to get what I want. A few years ago I made a plan to live in Spain and teach English for a year. When I did my TEFL course in Barcelona everyone made it seem very easy. As if you would just land in Spain and there would be a welcoming party of summer camps and English schools offering you, an English speaker, a job. So I went and I hunted for summer camp jobs, I was living in a crap apartment and found meeting people very hard. The thing is that a lot of poets and films make living in a crap apartment seem fun however sometimes a crap apartment is just a crap apartment. Anyway. Things didn’t go as planned, I was broke, eating a lot of sugar as I do when stressed and pretty depressed. However, never one to listen to all of the obvious signs telling me when to abandon ship, I went home, saved money, signed up for a volunteer program that would give me some experience and went back the next year. I found a job, a cute place and more importantly amazing friends. Thankfully these friends were much more adventurous than me so we had a lot of adventures, late nights dancing, Portugal on spring break, cycling trips where I lagged a bit behind if I’m honest (cycling not one of my strengths) trips to the art gallery and so on. Anyway, I digress, the point is I would have stayed in Manchester, ignoring the signs and being miserable and stubborn but I’m so glad we didn’t. Sometimes all the signs in the universe are telling you something and it’s best to listen to them, I think. But what do you do when everything goes wrong? I am no expert, but there’s a few things that I do that help.
1.) Take stock of your finances. Really, taking stock of everything is a good idea but especially look at your finances and see what you can afford to do about the current situation.
2.) Daydream. I am a big fan of dreaming and believe that planning a trip, or pinning a load of pictures of flowers on pinterest are extremely therapeutic. Plus dreaming reminds you that things won’t always be bad
3.)Get away- If you can afford it get away for a night or two. You don’t have to jet off to Paris (although if you have the money and time, why not?) It can be as simple as booking a night in a hotel, not worrying about your house, going out for dinner and getting a fresh perspective from away from everything that is wrong.
4.)Clean your house. When my house is messy I feel as if my life is more out of control than it is. A few minutes cleaning makes me feel better and see things differently. You don’t have to do a deep clean but doing a couple things can restore a bit of order to your life.
5.)Ask for help-perhaps you are like me and the thought of asking for help fills you with angst however, there are people who are willing and able to help and asking for help when you need it is one of the most important things you can do as an adult.